Domestic violence survivor shares story as Omaha sees deadly rise in cases

OMAHA, Neb. —

Four women in the Omaha area have died in shootings in just over a month, allegedly at the hands of their husbands or boyfriends, marking one of the deadliest months on record for domestic violence murders. In three of those cases, police say the men then turned the gun on themselves, taking their lives as well.

Outside Heartland Family Service in Papillion, roses begin to wither and fade—a fitting metaphor for Grace Kohls’ recent past.

“Felt like I couldn’t escape it at all,” Kohls said.

Kohls, a domestic violence survivor who escaped abuse two years ago, described the emotional toll of her experience. “There’s a lack of motivation to try again,” she said.

Reflecting on her journey, Kohls shared advice for others in similar situations. “I think it’s really important for whoever is in these situations, find out who you deeply trust and who you can confide in without judgment,” she said.

Kohls confided in a family member about her frightening and controlling relationship and found solid support at Heartland Family Service, where crisis calls are fielded daily.

“We have over a thousand phone calls a month anyway, looking for shelter or just some respite to get out of the house,” said Dawn Conley, who oversees the domestic violence program at Heartland Family Service.

Conley said this summer’s streak of domestic violence in Omaha is tragic but not surprising. “What’s the biggest barrier to getting help? Fear. Fear because it’s seven times more dangerous for them when they leave. That’s usually when you get critical injuries or death,” she said.

Conley explained that women seeking help can start with a simple phone call. “The hotline is confidential, and they don’t have to give us their name or anything if they just want to call and hash things out. They can absolutely do that,” she said.

Domestic Violence/Sexual Assault Hotline: 402-292-5888

From there, survivors can meet with an advocate or therapist to plan an exit from the relationship. “We have our safe haven shelter. We’re able to house 20 individuals,” Conley said. Last year, 85 people found refuge in the shelter.

To address the root causes of violence and prevent it from recurring, Heartland Family Service also offers five different groups for perpetrators.

“People who are abusing their partners, it’s not anger management. They’re not taking it out on anyone else. They feel this right: I can do this to my partner,” Conley said.

For survivors like Kohls, the process of healing is lengthy but transformative. “It’s a lot of inner work you have to do,” she said.

“It’s very rewarding. Standing up for the YOU that was in that relationship,” Kohls added.

The Heartland Family Service Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Hotline is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, at 402-292-5888. HFS also offers advocacy, legal services, support groups, therapy and groups for men who have abused their intimate partner.

To learn more go to Heartland Family Service.

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